What makes a successful marriage?
I am sure not the expert but I have been married for a long time to the same man. Just that in itself can be unusual these days. I was thinking on what have we done or not done to stay married?
We have:
- Done things together to have fun. Things like traveling, riding 4 wheelers, going to the movies, walking on the beach…….
- Made friendships that we both appreciate. Friends that you both have as a couple are rare. We have a few not a lot.
- Respected each other’s opinions even when they are not the same. Sometimes agreeing to disagree is the best answer.
- Recognized that we are 2 different people with some different interests and hobbies. I am an avid reader-my husband is not. He waits for the movie to come out.
- Speaking for me…..I have learned to pick my battles. I don’t have to have the last word. Sometimes it is just easier to shut my mouth and not say anything.
What we have not done: (you may disagree but this is what we’ve NOT done)
- Taken separate vacations. My husband has gone on hunting trips a few trips where I chose not to go. I’ve done a few things without him but don’t as a rule go do my own thing regularly. We love to travel together!
- Not been joined at the hip. This may seem to contradict #1 but for instance; he watches ballgames-I’ll watch something on my iPad. He wants to go to a movie or to eat with a friend-it’s totally all right with me. Usually it’s an action movie that I don’t want to see.
- Held grudges and brought up past mistakes over and over. There is NO perfect person and we sure aren’t. We forgive and forget.
- Tried to make the other spouse be just like me/him. We are 2 very different people. That’s probably why we were originally attracted to each other. He’s really into sports and I’d rather read. We make compromises and find things we can do together but NOT everything.
I’m sure there is lots more but maybe this gives you a little insight on how to stay in a relationship long term.
The only person we can control is ourselves, the person you see in the mirror. Once I really realized that it gave me freedom. Basically, work on myself harder than anyone or anything. Leave the working on my husband to him and God.
Blessings and may all you find the relationship you are wanting.
Vickie, SilverBoss
